Jesse Joyner, PhD

Well, almost anything.  I would not recommend  trying to balance cows, babies, or running jackhammers on your face.  But most anything else will work here.

Go ahead, pick the item closet to you and try to balance it on your face.  Difficult?  Let me help….

Rule Number 1: Start Simple, Go Large

You would think that simple means small, but quite the contrary.  The larger the object (not too large) the easier it is to balance.  Why?  Because the center of gravity (which you must stay beneath) is a larger area the larger the item is.  For example, a broom is much easier to balance on your chin than a pencil (go ahead, try it!).  Don’t go for elephants.  Start with brooms, plungers, shovels, or baseball bats.  My top recommendation (especially for kids) is a peacock feather or a yardstick (they’re safer than shovels).  Most people have a yardstick or something similar lying around the house.

Rule Number 2: Look at the TOP of the Object

This is the most important point about balancing anything.  Place the object vertically on your chin, nose, or forehead (chin is the best for starters) and stare at the tippy top of the object.  Do not look away from the top of the object.  Your intense focus on that top is the only secret to keeping it up there.  Furthermore, tilt your head back farther than you think.  All beginners tilt their head back only 45 degrees when really your face should be facing straight up, which is more like a 90 degree angle on your neck.  Keep tilting your head back until the back of your head pushes up against your upper back and can’t go any farther.  This does NOT feel natural, so it takes practice.  But you can do it.

Rule Number 3: Move Around

You will need some room to move (outside is not a bad idea).  Feel free to move your feet and walk a little as you strive to stay perfectly beneath your balanced object.  The more you practice, the less you’ll have to move around.

Let me know how it goes!

Intermediate: Try other parts of your face (nose, forehead) and other objects (bowls, spatulas, flaming torches).  For a real challenge, see how long you can keep a pencil on your nose (vertically).

Disclaimer: You alone are responsible for your own stitches, cuts, and broken glass coffee tables.  Please don’t put anything too heavy on your face.  If it hurts, its too heavy.  If you are a kid – get parental supervision.