Jesse Joyner, PhD

My beautiful wife Sarah is due with our first child next month (3rd week of September). We tried, waited, and prayed for 4 and a half years to have a child before we got pregnant. We experienced the pains of infertility, such as seeing so many happy families with children all around us, some of them (with good intentions) asking us when we were going to have children. We would just have to respond with things like, “When the time is right…” if we were not interested in having a deep, emotional conversation at the moment.

Then came the joy of getting pregnant, which came as a welcomed surprise. In the midst of the joy, more fears raced through my mind, such as the health of the baby and mommy and seeing them pull through this amazing journey to a healthy labor and delivery.

So far, so good. Thank you to all who have supported us and prayed for us through this time. We love our friends and family.

With a month to go, I thought I would list out a few things on my mind currently about being a Dad soon.

1. I’ve wanted to be a Dad for as long as I can remember – a main reason being the joy and love and security I experienced from my own father.

2. I’m past the “ready” point. Many Dads have about 9 months to emotionally prepare. I feel like I’ve had a longer waiting period because of the waiting period Sarah and I went through in order to get pregnant.

3. Every Dad I’ve ever talked to would place the birth of their first child somewhere in the top 2 or 3 moments of their lives. All I can say is that I can only imagine that feeling and experience. You can tell me all day long how special that is, but I will never really know what its like until the day comes next month.

4. I get filled with emotion when I am around the babies and small children of our friends. My “Dad” pistons are firing up more and more as each day goes by.

5. I heard someone say that a woman becomes a mother when she gets pregnant, but a man becomes a father when he holds the baby for the first time. I think that has to do with the whole “carrying” concept. The woman is constantly carrying this new life and the man can only feel the kicking and set up the crib. I’m looking forward to my first experience of carrying our child.

6. I have also heard from too many people about the tons of dirty diapers, sleepless nights, and endless crying. I think I get the picture. And I will not know what it’s really like until it happens. Until then, I’m confident that we’ll somehow make it through.

7. Speaking of “until then,” I realize this will be one of the calmest months of my life until about 2040, depending on how many children we end up having. So here’s to quiet nights and a clean house. Then I say, “Bring it on, baby.”